The Virtue of Forgiveness
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According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary virtue is defined as a type of morality, valor, merit and beneficial quality. When a person thinks about characteristic merits in which somebody might possess, can their abilities to forgive, meet the basic qualifying standards of being an individual with virtues? How often do you think of a person's ability to forgive someone or something, comes into play when a description is needed for that person? I don't think I have ever heard the word "forgiving" be used as a way to describe another human being. It's not something that generally comes across as a descriptive factor:
"Oh, she's real forgiving...", "Yeah, he forgave...", "Here now lies Fred, he was a forgiving man..."
That all sounds kinda funny to me. But when you think about what it takes to forgive someone, it's really not that funny sounding anymore. Therefore, can forgiveness or the act of forgiving someone who has cause you harm in essence be a virtue too? Well by golly, I think it can.
It takes patience to forgive. It takes a real act of courage to find forgiveness in ones heart. I also think it takes an incredible amount of strength to forgive someone, and yet be able to look at yourself in the mirror. Courage, strength, patience..., quite easily the most used descriptive words used to describe acts of valor, or commemorate merit. Yet, when we forgive someone and swallow our pride- we are essentially using these same skills; virtues, if you will- to accomplish the act of forgiveness with.
Therefore, the next time you are needing to be forgiven, try not to take what that person has just done for you too lightly. Although we cannot award people the Medal of Honor for bravery shown by way of forgiveness, we can at least remember their courage, and give them the undying respect that is due to them. Forgiveness, in my book is definitely a definitive virtue.
1.)
a : conformity to a standard of right : morality
b : a particular moral excellence
2.) a : beneficial quality or power of a thing
3.) a : manly strength or courage : valor 4.)
a : commendable quality or trait :merit
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Thank you for the warm and kind words! Feel free to post a link or two to an article that would help complete this hub.
I have written a few articles on this topic, as you know. Personally I try to look at it this way. I have had a little experience with this. When you forgive and do not take opportunity to "get back at" an individual that has wronged you, others think you are letting that person walk all over you. I knew this person that really, really hated Christians. I worked side by side and I guess the way I looked at stuff really bothered the heck out of her. She actively tried to set me up to get fired over and over. I would conservatively say at least 4 times. Plus chatting in the boss' ear every day. Other co-workers (even Christians) thought I was weak, cowardly and allowed her to walk all over me. Now the boss was a cagey lady that knew what was up. One day she pulled me into her office and asked me why I never did anything to hurt her back. I never talked bad about her. I never made her look bad, in fact I covered for her mistakes (like co-workers supposed to do). My reply was simple, "If she considers me her enemy just because I'm a Christian, what am I to do? If I do not love her, who will?"
I do not know if I ever made any headway with her. She changed work locations and I rarely, if ever, saw her. When I did, I always smiled and said "hi." I know one thing. If she was always connected to the acts she commited in my mind I could not have forgiven her. I could not have loved her because of Jesus because I would be saying in my heart, "but she did that..." I remember what she did but it has no teeth. It is just an event and I wonder often if her heart has changed toward Christians. Now don't think I am special or something because I was able to do this because I had to put my mind in a place of strength to do it and I did not always want to. That place of strength is in Jesus' hand. I do not like pain or the feeling like I am a target but I feel that was the thing I was led to do and I was not going to argue with the One who was leading me. Love ya Julie, as always I send hugs and smiles your way.
Forgiveness is a very under-appreciated virtue. Maybe that's because so few people are good at it, so they dismiss it. But real forgiveness is a wonderful thing and it takes a big person to forgive. Certainly, there has to be a line between forgiving and being a door mat for someone who will repreatedly hurt you, but it's possible to cut someone out of your life and still forgive them for it.
Excellent hub,
Rob
Thanks you two!!! This virtue is something I personally need to work on. I have a terrible time forgiving wrong doings. And, I know I waste way too much good energy, on this negative nonsense. But I don't seem to have the courage to not be so self serving. Its hard and truthfully its easier to be lazy.
I truely draw strength from your posts. I have been feeling a little depleted lately. Thanks Bob.
I need to learn how to do that... Cut off yet forgiven. I would be better off for it. I know now why pride was listed as one of the seven deadly sins by Pope Gregory... It is hard.
Voting this Up and Beautiful.
Feeling Fit 4 months ago
Thank you for this lovely hub & the adorable photo with an excellent message.
Forgiveness is the gift that we give to ourselves, & you've made that clear in this lovely article. Nice work! Well done!
"A Course In Miracles" does a wonderful job of clarifying what forgiveness really is & how it's meant to operate to create true & lasting healing. I appreciate your article; it put me in mind of ACIM.
Many thanks & warmest regards...Feeling Fit